Moving on & Life After the Divorce Process

Couple after a divorce

As the divorce process is understandably a difficult and stressful time for families and those involved. This can also make life after a divorce particularly difficult and stressful, especially if the divorce ended in acrimonious circumstances. Although the divorce process should ideally end in amicable circumstances – this is not always the case and therefore this can complicate things post-divorce.


This article is an addition to our other articles offering divorce advice looks beyond the divorce process and offers advice to those who are making arrangements after a divorce has been finalised as well as discussing the final stages of the divorce process.


Should you be facing a divorce or are at the end stages of the divorce process – we can help. We have helped numerous clients who are in a similar situation to yourself and are able to offer advice and support during this understandably difficult time. Get in touch using an online contact form on our website or telephone our friendly team now.


The Final Stages of the Divorce Process


The last stage of the divorce is upon the granting of the decree absolute and this marks the end of a marriage in legal terms. Upon reaching this stage, it is likely that financial agreements have been made as well as agreements regarding children however this may not be the case. After a marriage has legally ended, you may want the courts to deal with financial agreements and agreements regarding children – especially if you are not able to reach amicable agreements in these areas. 


Mediation is often used to try and reach amicable agreements. This is not a marriage counselling service – it is used as a tool to reach agreements for couples that are already going through the end of their marriage and allows for an impartial party to be present and help reach solutions. Any agreements that are reached during the mediation process can be written up and made legally binding by the courts should this be required.


Deciding and Knowing the Future is Ahead


It is understandably a very difficult time should anyone go through the divorce process. It may feel as if life has turned upside down and the future is looking very uncertain. The potential move out of a family home, as well as the effects on family life after the divorce, can also make life after divorce seem impossible to understand and navigate. There are however some ways in which you can approach life after a divorce to take control of certain aspects and continue onwards into the future.


Accepting the Present and Moving Forwards


It is natural and human nature to grieve after something is lost so it’s important to allow time to grieve for a lost relationship. This can help in the healing process and relationship experts predict it takes around half the time of the relationship to fully process and come to terms with the fact that the relationship is over. It’s important to bear in mind that it will take time so this is something to bear in mind after a divorce is finalised.


Speaking to Children About a Divorce


One of the hardest aspects of a divorce or life after a divorce is discussing the situation with children. Children, (especially at younger ages) are prone to take the brunt of a divorce and speaking to them about how they feel can be highly difficult. There is a risk that they may feel to blame for the divorce as well as feeling alienated and gravitate towards one parent. Every situation is different so it’s important to consider how children are feeling at all stages of the divorce and after a divorce. Some tips on discussing divorce with children after the divorce is finalised are below:


  • Ensure to have open and healthy discussions with children about the divorce especially once the divorce is finalised. It’s very important to ensure that children feel loved, that they can discuss their feelings and that they are not forced to take sides. 
  • Observe different or erratic behaviour. Divorce can affect everyone in different ways so it’s vital that you keep an eye out for behaviour such as anger, substance abuse and other avenues in which frustrations can be taken out.  
  • Keep communication positive when discussing any aspect of the divorce around children. They can be extremely perceptive of negative attitudes and opinions – especially from their parents. If the divorce is not amicable then it’s highly advised to keep discussions about the situation away from children. 
  • Trust, communication and transparency are key to all relationships. It’s really important to ensure that you are honest with children whilst adjusting some of the things conveyed when speaking to them. 
  • Do not shy away from discussing aspects that will be changing in a child’s life. This is hugely important when discussing huge changes such as moving into a different property. 
  • It’s vital to follow visitation agreements and what times children are at different homes and with the other parent. This plan will be agreed when the divorce is finalised and this is enforced by court if these are breached.


Financial Life After a Divorce

Couple dealing with divorce

The other major factor and arguably one of the most important aspects of a divorce is agreements regarding finances. Life after divorce will have a financial agreement put into place as well as other arrangements such as paying for child education or paying for things needed for children when they are living in another home. Gaining financial independence and arranging for finances on your own is a great way to restore independence after a divorce and face the future. 


As the divorce process ends, this can be a great way to start fresh and move forwards with the road that is ahead. Financial agreements can set clear foundations for the path ahead so it’s very important to reach a financial agreement that is fair to both parties and provides stability going forwards.


If you are facing a divorce or are at the end of the divorce process – we can help. Get in touch using an online contact form on our website or telephone our friendly team now.

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